SLASHseeker24/7 ([info]barbossa_lover) wrote,
@ 2008-02-21 20:59:00
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What do I do?
MOG, I'm sorry I have to ask, but what do you do when you're about to lose someone that's really close to you?
As you know, I've already suffered a loss, so what should I do this time?

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[info]apple4b
2008-02-21 09:37 pm UTC (link)
What do you mean by "losing someone" ?...
Do you mean this close person is leaving the area you live in... or life ?...
Could it be a close friend who betrayed you, or something else ?...

Excuse me if I ask you this precise questions, but I consider it's important !!!!... That's really not the same meaning !!!!

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[info]barbossa_lover
2008-02-21 09:38 pm UTC (link)
Leaving life.

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[info]apple4b
2008-02-21 10:11 pm UTC (link)
Oh ! That's what I thought !!!!!
I suppose your close friend has got what people call "a long disease"...

My dear... I do know how words can be useless in this kind of evil times...
Do you have Faith ?!...
I mean... whatever your religion... the most important is what you believe in !...

I'm really not a "faithfull" girl !!!!
I admit that I have been raised into catholic religion without never believe in... and I found a lot of answers to all my questions about life and death... into the buddhism philosophy, and a sentence just came to my mind when I read your comment :
"The death is neither depressing, neither seducing. It's only a reality of life (or a life reality)"

Of course, to lose your close friend must be awful to live, but you have a big mission, now... not let you invade by the sadness, in order to let him/her go away in peace.
Be as simple as possible with this person... but JUST YOURSELF !
This person just needs the truth, and some genuines feelings, moments and gestures...

That's a terrible mission, I know !!!!! Really hard to carry out !
I lost myself a lot of close people, and by violent departures, as well... But I never lived the moments you're currently living... to see one people I love leaving...

I let you know, by the private message, that I'll answer you tomorrow... But how could I let you down in such moments ?...

I only regret that I'm not bilingual to let you know all my deepest feelings about you and your story !...
To talk death is so special... but when you don't know very well to use another language, it's harder...
I just wish I helped you a little bit in this terrible time for you... and I also wish you all the best !!!!!

Be brave, dear !!!!!
All my deepest thoughts are with you and your friend !!!!

And don't hesitate to ask me more !!!!
I'm really blessed you asked me that !!!!!
Lots of love !!!!!!!

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[info]barbossa_lover
2008-02-21 10:35 pm UTC (link)
Yeah. She has epalepsie (can't spell it) and she has been constantly fainting even when there's no flashing. The doctors say they don't know what's happening to her. I believe in God, but if he is up there, why does he let so many deaths happen?

I lost a friend a while ago from asythma (can't spell it either). I'm tired of it happening and I hste getting close to people cause I'm afaird of ir happening again.

It really means a lot to me that you are replying. I didn't want to cause any bother, but it means a lot to me. It really does. Thank you.

Lots of love to you too.

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[info]apple4b
2008-02-24 05:08 pm UTC (link)
First, sorry for this long delay... But now, I have more free time...

Your friend has Epilepsy, that's right ?!... I ignored we could die from this illness !...
God !!!! My niece has also Epilepsy !!!!!

I believe in God, but if he is up there, why does he let so many deaths happen?
That's always I asked to my parents, when I saw some stuff I considered like unfair (and there are a lot, in this poor World), and tehy always answered me that it was because God let the human being free...
I don't like this explanation !!!!!
That's why I turn myself to buddhist philosphy !!!! There, I had some answers...

There are so many people on Earth who just don't deserve what happen to them... so many cruaulty, so many women in despair, so many children in pain...
That reminds me the first quote of Walsingham in Elizabeth :
"There is so little beauty in this world, and so much suffering. Do you suppose that is what God had in mind? That is to say if there is a god at all. Perhaps there is nothing in this universe but ourselves. And our thoughts."

Please, if ever you need to chat about all this, do not hesitate !!!!!!!
Even with our different languages... I'll try to do my best !!!!!

I wish you again a GOOD LUCK for your following days !

Love !

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[info]barbossa_lover
2008-02-24 05:24 pm UTC (link)
That's alright. I've been spending all my time with Sarah (she's the girl that has Epilepsy. That's good to hear.

I didn't know that you could until the Doctors told us. Is your niece feeling alright?

Yeah. That is a good explanation. I also don't agree with it. What did you find in buddist philosphy.

I know. People who don't deserve it, it just happens to them. Jessica was also really carefree and in a matter of days she was gone. I really love that quote. It's really true.

Thank you. You do fine.

Love you too and thanks.

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[info]apple4b
2008-02-25 03:14 pm UTC (link)
Yeah ! My niece seem quite alright... She's got a strong treatment... and she's rather reasonable.

What did you find in buddist philosphy.
Well, a lot of answers, the beginning of the wisdom, how to accept some unfair things, how to live better with my own anger, my own sadness, by managing to recognize how they come, to analyse them, and then to prevent them...

What I prefer in the buddhism is the lack of dogmas !
Even as a very young kiddie, I was always against every obligations ! ;)

Buddhists never tried to convert anyone to their religion or philosophy ! They let people free to keep their previous religion...

Jessica was also really carefree and in a matter of days she was gone.
I totally understand !!!!!
I myself saw so many young people die, as they shouldn't !
Life is short, cruel and unfair !
3 more reasons to not take it too much seriously... and to enjoy every single happy moments !

I really hope you spent a good day, despite of all your bad stuff around you !
♥ ♥ ♥

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[info]barbossa_lover
2008-02-25 04:54 pm UTC (link)
That's good to hear.

I just find it hard to accept death. Although we hear about it all around the world, its just hard to accept.

I never knew anything about Buddhists, but they sound pretty cool.

Yeah, it was a good day consdiering everything. I hope you had a good day.

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[info]apple4b
2008-02-25 05:47 pm UTC (link)
My own day was Ok, thanks !

Of course, it's really hard to accept death !!!!!
How could we ?!...

But we must consider it like an inescapable part of life !!!!
If we accept life, we have to accept death ! Our own, I mean... For me, it's less hard to consider my own departure from life than the death of the ones I love...

I read the amazing book of a certain dr Moody, "Life After Life... Did you read it ?!...
That's really amazing, and it gives you a less frightened view of the death...

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[info]barbossa_lover
2008-02-26 05:12 pm UTC (link)
That's good to hear.

I don't think anyone can.

Yeah, that's true.

Never heard of it but it has an interesting title. I wanna read it.

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[info]x_mog
2008-02-22 05:16 pm UTC (link)
This is a tough situation. It's just...really tough. When someone is very sick and isn't getting better.... I've been in this situation but, I don't think anything really makes it better. Nothing can ease the loss of someone you love. I hate to have to say that. I wish there were some way to make it easy. I really do.

The only thing I can tell you is to spend as much time with this person as you can and let them know how much you care. I will pray for your friend. I will have my friends pray for your friend. I know it isn't much. But it's all I can do for you.

This is a hard time and I hope very much that your friend will be okay. I wish I could do more for you. I love you and I'm always here if you need someone to talk to.

You've got my e-mail, right?

mokubasofficalglomper@yahoo.com

Wishing you and your friend the best.

~MOG

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[info]barbossa_lover
2008-02-22 08:06 pm UTC (link)
Yeah. I know it's only happened a few times to me, but it seems like there's no end to the pain. God, I still remember talking to Jessica as if it was yesterday.

I've been spending almost all my time with her. The only time I don't see her is when she's at the Hospital and when we both head home. I snap at her a lot. I don't mean to, I really don't, but how can she act so carefree when she knows that she could leave in a matter of days?

Thank you. For praying, for asking your friends to and for taking time to give me advice. I really appreciate it.

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[info]x_mog
2008-02-23 12:51 am UTC (link)
Try to see if from her point of view. She might not have long. She probaly doesn't want to spend that time moping over it. You gotta live every day to the fullest and not think too much on what could happen tomorow. I think she must be very brave to keep going like that.

I'm praying for her. Even though I do not know her, I am praying.

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[info]barbossa_lover
2008-02-23 09:30 am UTC (link)
I never thought of that. I just thought that if she could die in a matter of days, and she's not entirely worried about it. She is brave, and stubborn.

Thank you. I told her and she also said thanks.

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[info]x_mog
2008-02-23 08:09 pm UTC (link)
Well, I'm here if you need to talk. *Hugs*

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[info]barbossa_lover
2008-02-24 05:25 pm UTC (link)
Thank you.

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[info]rushysgirl
2008-02-24 07:09 am UTC (link)
I was just catching up on my f-list reading, and I read that and it's so sad to hear. Even worse than someone passing away is knowing that someone is sick and having to face saying goodbye...like actually knowing they are going to die and having to deal with that. All you can do is let her know what she has meant to you, the memories that she's given those around her in her life, and tell her even though she probably already knows it, that she will be in your heart and your thoughts forever. It's horrible to have to face it when it's inevitable that it will happen, and it sounds as if she is young, right? That's even harder to cope with. A friend of mine died in a car accident last year, but at least with something like that they don't have to go on suffering and it happens instantly so it doesn't cause pain and heartache and worry for others until it happens. I hope you can stay strong to let your friend know that you are there for you, in those times what people need is to be assured that the people around them care about them. That's the most important thing, because nothing else really matters anymore, just the thoughts and care of others.

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[info]barbossa_lover
2008-02-24 05:30 pm UTC (link)
Thanks for taking the time to read this. It is really sad and terrible. Just thinking that I may go to sleep one night, the next, I might get a phonecall from her parents saying she's gone. It just kinda annoys me that she acts so calm as if she just has a simple cold! I sometimes feel like knocking some sense into her. She might die! What is there to be happy about?
Yeah, she's the same age as me (14)
Oh, Im' sorry. It is a really terrible feeling. But the way your friend died in a car accident, you didn't know it was gonna to happen and it didn't feel like the person was prolonging it. That's what it feels like for me.
Thank you. *hugs*

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